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Confirmed: Rob Ford WILL attend Pride parade

Posted on June 30th, 2011 3 Comments

That’s right, you read it here first … Rob Ford will be attending Pride after all! Here’s the official statement:

rob ford, puppet, marionette, toronto, city, life, blog

Gotta say I was starting to lose faith in our new(ish) mayor, but it looks like he’s gonna come through after all. And he’ll even be dressed for the occasion!

rob ford, puppet, marionette, toronto, city, life, blog

That’s the spirit! I dunno if I’d have the courage to strut around with assless chaps and a hand betwixt the pillows, but good on Rob, eh?

rob ford, puppet, marionette, toronto, city, life, blog

We owe a debt of gratitude to Paula Corbett of Bad Bunny Puppets for convincing Rob to be a part of the parade. She and our risqué mayor will be hanging out in front of St. Lawrence Market’s north hall for the next couple of days and, of course, you can drop by her site to pay your respects for all her hard work too.

Filed under: Dispatches, Patrick Bay, Pictures

Rob Ford on Jarvis Street bike lanes

Posted on June 28th, 2011 2 Comments

Almost a full year after they were added to Jarvis Street, the Rob Ford administration is looking to take out the Jarvis Street bike lanes to make room for — guess what — cars! Here’s a mass email that was received recently from his office on the topic:

Thank you for your email regarding the bike lanes on Jarvis Street. I appreciate hearing from you.

Toronto’s economy loses billions of dollars every year from gridlock and traffic congestion. We need to make the situation better – not worse. The Jarvis Street bike lanes experiment has been a failure. Ninety-four percent of commuters now face longer commutes on Jarvis Street. Over 15,000 commuters each day are suffering from longer travel times, for the sake of 600 additional cyclists.

The City should remove the bike lanes as soon as possible and improve travel times for thousands of daily commuters. City staff have been directed to develop a low-cost plan to do so. Bike lanes were never intended to be installed on Jarvis Street. The original Environmental Assessment recommended against installing bike lanes – but City Council amended the report to approve bike lanes anyway.

As promised during the mayoral election, I am dedicated to delivering customer service excellence, creating a transparent and accountable government, reducing the size and cost of government and building a transportation city.

Thank you again for taking the time to share your thoughts. Please feel free to contact my office again at any time.

Yours truly,

Mayor Rob Ford
City of Toronto

Just in time for ye ole road toll debate to rage up again!

Filed under: Dispatches, Patrick Bay

‘Olivia Chow is no Jack Layton’: Doug Ford likes brother Rob’s re-election chances

Posted on November 21st, 2012 Be the first to comment

http://www.nationalpost.com/m/wp/posted-toronto/blog.html?b=news.nationalpost.com/2012/11/21/olivia-chow-is-no-jack-layton-doug-ford-likes-brother-robs-re-election-chances

Filed under: Dispatches, SarahD

SPI#3: Off the robbed and beaten path

Posted on September 6th, 2022 Be the first to comment

September 2020 to September 2022

Most discerning travelers know that getting the full experience of a destination requires eschewing well-worn tourist routes.

And besides, who wants another boring guide about local eateries and “quirky” establishments? Haven’t you had your fill of “safe and friendly”? How about some real local flavour?

As you can see on the map above, Toronto is teeming with all sorts of engaging and exciting experiences, ranging from traditional holdups to fast drive-by snatches. You might even get to experience an authentic carjacking.

With an average of over 20 events reported per day you’re bound to find something to get your heart racing almost anywhere in the city!

In fact, for the extreme adventure travel enthusiast there are really only 4 areas to avoid (5 if you include the Toronto Islands).

1. West Hill / Port Union

While the north-west portion of West Hill offers excellent opportunities for thrill seekers, its southern boundary with the Port Union neighbourhood is to be avoided.

2. The Bridle Path

Nothing here but the secluded mansions of rich and famous people. Skip.

3. Downsview Airport

Maybe it’s the area’s historical association with the Canadian military but very little happens on the grounds of this airport. Nearby neighbourhoods are worth a visit.

4. Etobicoke

This western chunk of the city is the traditional home of the Fords but now that the brothers have have either left or are in the process of leaving, it seems that the type of crime that they might attract is evaporating. Perhaps everyone got day jobs.

Luckily, if you take a short bus ride in almost any direction you’re bound to increase your chances of finding a compelling encounter!

I hope you’ve found this post informative and that when you’re next in Toronto you consider visiting one of our city’s many colourful, independent business people!

P.S. Too much data to include at the end as usual. Contact me if interested.

Filed under: Dispatches, Patrick Bay, Pictures, SPI

Doug Ford is literally a DICTATOR, but don’t worry, it’s for your own good

Posted on July 23rd, 2021 Be the first to comment

I recall some people mentioning that it was paranoid to suggest that the COVID excuse was going to be extended indefinitely (variants!) and used as an excuse by the state to impose overt, totalitarian, tyrannical control over the population. To be honest, it seemed a bit alarmist to me too, although there were some warning signs. Well, things have progressed.

So you want the good news or the bad news first?

The good news is that there is no longer any doubt about this, it’s 100% in effect right now. The bad news is that people are too busy packing patios and parks after a year and a half of mental house arrest (all that’s missing is the tracking anklet), and although some local news – which fail to explain how exactly governments have been “handed” all these powers – is predictably pointing fingers abroad to demonstrate growing state authoritarianism, no one here really seems to give a shit. As long as you can have a beer outdoors once in a while, I guess, it’s no longer a terrifying dystopian nightmare of absolute government control and tyranny.

And of course, Canadian mainstream media is simply the propaganda arm of the state (note how all the big networks report exactly the same stories, often verbatim, in order to push a “progressive” narrative while completely ignoring others), so they won’t be doing anything but pushing ever more tyranny.

Without barely a whimper, the “Declaration of Emergency” (O.Reg 264/21) for the province of Ontario was revoked in early June. Cool … no more emergency! Now all that’s left is the bold and progressive “Reopening Ontario” Act — nearly a year old, so obviously not part of a long-term scheme at all. Obviously.

Oh, wait, what’s that right at the top of the Act?

2 (1) The orders made under section 7.0.2 or 7.1 of the Emergency Management and Civil Protection Act that have not been revoked as of the day this subsection comes into force are continued as valid and effective orders under this Act and cease to be orders under the Emergency Management and Civil Protection Act.

Reopening Ontario (A Flexible Response to COVID-19) Act, 2020, S.O. 2020, c. 17

In case you missed that, it means that although it’s no longer an emergency, Doug Ford keeps his “emergency” (i.e. literally dictatorial), powers at least until the end of the the year. Of course, that might “need” to be extended longer (“Flexible”), but just until Ontario is “rebuilt”.

But hey, don’t worry about it. It’s not like Doug is using some sort of martial law to force-close businesses while lining his buddies’ pockets like a banana republic generalisimo, or thinking of imposing curfews like some East German Stasi schmuck, or arbitrarily fucking around with elections like some crazed autocrat, or waving entire sections of the law aside with his hand like some common dictator. Obviously not.

Unfortunately, this is just the tip of a very large and very ugly iceberg of what appears to be a, so far successful, attempt at an authoritarian one-world government. I’m not the only one to point out this trend but what seems to regularly get missed in the analysis is both that it’s happening right here at home and the level of international coordination, not to mention kow-towing deference, that’s being shown to global health “authorities” who simultaneously bemoan the devastation of COVID while encouraging people from all over the world to come together in maskless groups of heavy-breathers in order to “inspire” (just don’t do what they’re doing!), without even a hint of a suggestion of irony or that it’s actually the people who are supposed to be in charge in our so-called “democracy”. I’ve pointed out how Canada is in no way a democracy and never has been, representative or otherwise, neither by definition nor by deed, but now the state has dispensed with the need to crassly lie to people about it.

To paraphrase Ford: it’s open dictatorship, folks!

I was initially planning to write one huge post to cover the very overt, very public scam being perpetrated on the population of the world in the name of health and safety but it would go on for days so the next few posts I’m going to be covering this very obvious takeover by this woke new form of tyrannical totalitarianism. I’ll point out the glaring gap in science, evidence, and increasingly simple common sense that we’re all being forced to swallow in the name of “keeping everyone safe”.

To the haters of skepticism and critical inquiry there is nothing that exceeds the God-like wisdom and superiority of our benign, loving government and their throngs of “experts”. I’m sure I’ll be called an anti-vaxxer for having the audacity to even think about questioning the COVID vaccines now increasingly being forced onto people around the world using what in any other circumstances would be considered vile state-sponsored hate speech (can violence be far behind?). I’m sure I’ll be labelled a conspiracy theorist for pointing directly to government websites, proud pronouncements by public officials, and undisputed widespread events as evidence to back my claims. I’m sure I’ll be described as crazy for suggesting that we can see what’s happening around us every day instead of being told what reality is by the state.

Deniers of reality will continue to watch people like Trudeau elbow bump instead of shaking hands because, obviously, preventing an air-borne virus is done most effectively not by keeping as far away from others as possible (e.g. shaking hands if absolutely necessary), but by getting up nice and close. Probably this is the same reason why unmasked, unvaccinated children were encouraged to go back to school to mingle — it’s risky for masked adults to get closer than two meters but having often asymptomatic kids within a few feet of those same adults makes perfect sense. Logic! Science!

But hey, don’t worry; it’s for your own good.

Filed under: B Sides, Patrick Bay, Why I'm Right

A Ford by any other name

Posted on July 22nd, 2014 Be the first to comment

Thanks to the keen eyes of the interweb along with a little follow-up research I discovered today that Rob Ford’s nephew Michael Ford (currently running for mayor), recently changed his name from Michael Stirpe To Michael Ford (with the name Douglas A. Ford thrown in there for good measure).

Much like the Fords of yesteryear, it appears young Michael has adopted the Ford name to disassociate from a shady past acquired via his father Ennio (the Heroin addict who shot his mother in the face). Because the name Ford is so much better.

Filed under: Dispatches, Patrick Bay

Ford & Blair: another theory

Posted on July 3rd, 2014 Be the first to comment

Now, I have to stress, this is totally just a theory. I have no evidence of any of this — it is a pure flight of fancy.

But let’s consider this: how come Rob Ford is still roaming the halls of City Hall, locking reporters out, and basically being good old RoFo again? And anyone have a pool going on when he officially (documented) hits the pipe again? How far off can it be?

But he does look slimmer, I’ll give him that. His stay in unbelievably picturesque Bracebridge must’ve been good. And not too cheap neither. Bracebridge is one of the jewels in what is basically the Canadian Hamptons.

In any event, and for whatever reason, the Fords are either intimidating to Chief Blair and many others, or they’re (Fords + Blair + others) working together. Whatever the case, the top cop refuses to touch Ford with so much as a fifty-foot pole wielded by a lackey who is on concurrent traffic duty. I’ve already established this point a couple of times.

So instead, Blair decides to shuffle the investigation over to various parties, thereby washing his hands of the situation. Enforcement won’t be involved.

The courts decide that, for perhaps the same whatever reason, they don’t want to deal with this either, so they hang it out to dry like the crusty laundry it is.

The complicit media behemoths provide watered-down analysis to ensure the public that everything and anything in God’s creation that could have been done was done. We’ll simply have to accept that our Mayor is a hard-drug-smoking, prostitute-cavorting, extortion-associating, gun-and-drug-running-related, murder-linked guy; he’s just a regular multi-millionaire like the rest of us except that he’s got a disease! So obviously it would be discriminatory to even suggest that he leave City Hall at this point.

And, of course, it’s completely coincidental that the Ontario Human Rights Commission declared that addiction is a disease just before RoFo made his ignominious return. Right?

Not to put too fine a point on it, imagine going to your office after hours wasted (on multiple occasions), harassing the security, and inviting “unknown persons” in for late night parties. Not only does this not get you fired, but you threaten to sue your boss for discriminating against you because of your “disease” – the criminal excuse du jour that ends up making legitimate addicts (who purposefully hurt no one but themselves), seem like degenerates. Rob Ford is using a real medical condition to legitimize his open criminality, lies, and ongoing scumbaggery. Pretty slimy thing to do, huh? Well, that’s Rob Ford for you!

The cops might be chicken shit for whatever reason, or they may be deferential for whatever reason. The courts may have equal whatever reasons. The end result in either case is that the law was not applied equally and neither was the investigation.

So could they be working together?

Wait, no, that’s no possible. Remember when Rob and Doug chewed the chief out?

Let me offer another theory.

What if there were some secret meetings that took place in which exactly this scenario would be hatched? Rob and Doug would publicly vilify the chief (easy) who would put on a stoic face (easy) and hand the matter off to a less improprietous body, which itself would turn around and just make the whole thing public (easy). Rob and Doug gain fans because they’re under such furious attack, Bill looks like the proper police chief, and the wise court gives the people what they really want — titillating, salacious details.

The whole matter: under the rug, RoFo & Co. are pleased (as are their masters), and everyone looks like they’re just doing they’re job. Except they’re really not.

Filed under: Dispatches, Patrick Bay, Why I'm Right

Ethics, morality, common sense “don’t faze” the Fords

Posted on December 13th, 2013 Be the first to comment

See, when I make headlines like the one above, I always get the feeling that new readers are going to immediately dismiss the accompanying posts simply because the headlines sound made-up. At the very least, they sound like hyperbole or some sort of truth-bending. The other option is that I’m just pulling the readers’ legs.

And yet, not only is the one-liner accurate, as is usually the case with the Fords, it actually doesn’t go nearly far enough.

The ethics thing comes straight from the mouth and hand of reprobascious Doug Ford who marched into a social housing project in his ward with a wad of cash and started peeling off $20 bills to hand out to residents. Such actions obviously prove, as they have since day one, that Rob and Doug are just two average guys like the rest of us — not the rich, privileged, “elite”, corrupt, greezee-haired, gold-chained mobster politicians that their “enemies” are (which basically encompasses everyone at this point). Obviously.

doug ford gangster

This obvious vote-buying isn’t a problem, apparently, since an election has not yet been called. But even if we were in an election period and something could be done (which it wouldn’t), it’s clear that there would be no consequences to the belligerent Ford reign. And, of course, it wouldn’t be Ford (either one, really), if he didn’t defend his vileness while simultaneously letting the world know what he thinks of morals and ethics:

It’s my choice [to grease palms]. He [Councillor Gord Perks] can think all the ethics he wants. It doesn’t even faze me.

The very same can be said of brother Rob who, as you may recall, is facing a libel suit for alleging that Toronto Star reporter Daniel Dale is a pedophile, a claim made for no apparent reason in a now-missing Vision TV interview with fellow loquacious loser Conrad Black (Vision, part of rich media barron Moses Znaimer’s ZoomerMedia, is also being sued for the same reason). There’s absolutely no proof that I know of to back Ford’s claim — in fact, plenty to the contrary showing that Rob Ford is, as he always was, a lying, immoral, violent, crack-smoking jerkhole.

But, you know, he wouldn’t be Robbie if he didn’t stand by his bizarre off-the-cuff slander time and time again; and, of course, it wouldn’t be Doug if he didn’t defend his brother’s unconscionable bullshit the whole way.

Filed under: B Sides, Patrick Bay, Pictures

Is Robbie using again?

Posted on November 29th, 2013 6 Comments

I don’t watch Bill O’Reilly. At all. Couldn’t even tell you what network he’s on.  And to be honest, lately I’ve kinda been tuning out of the Rob Ford Show anyway, regardless of where it happens to pitch its tent — it’s tiring hearing the unending drone of repetitive, mind-numbing bullshit he’s clearly convinced himself will make his lies true.

O’Reilly’s interview, however, caught my eye because it looks very much like Robbie has been dabbling in a little pixie dust/crystal again:

Filed under: Dispatches, Patrick Bay, Videos

Rob’s terrible, horrible, no good, very bad day

Posted on November 18th, 2013 1 Comment

News of Rob Ford’s demotion by City Council was swift and brutal, as was the Ford brothers’ on-the-spot retribution against heckling citizens in the gallery.

On his way to punch out the boisterous audience, Rob managed to bowl over Councillor Pam McConnell before joining brother Doug in exchanging unpleasantries with the public. Or maybe it was after. Not sure it matters.

Very few people stand behind the mayor and his brother at this point, mostly for fear of getting hit in the face, but also because it’s kinda tough to defend the increasingly nutty behaviour of the two.

Only fellow Twitterer @Jedimasterbator offered what I see as some reasonable explanations:

In Rob Ford’s defense:

  1. Women and kids ARE easier to knock down.
  2. No kids at City Hall.
  3. Newton’s Laws of Motion.
  4. Mondays.
Filed under: Dispatches, Patrick Bay