Contentious is a good word to describe the Toronto Life Square Building, a.k.a. 10 Dundas East. Typical lamentations include descriptions like “ugly”, “awful”, “disappointing”, and “my grandmother wouldn’t take a crap on this thing, and she wears diapers!”

The fact that Chris Hume chose this particular building for the number five slot in his “Worst Buildings of Toronto” list is kinda like saying, “I don’t like Hitler”, or “that Bin Laden guy was a jerk” — most people would tend to agree.

For me, the Toronto Life building isn’t the affront on North American culture that some people insist it is, but its thin, crowded interior with its centerpiece of narrow escalators is a total letdown after walking under that massive facade. I don’t know that this building would’ve made my own top-five-worst list, but Toronto could certainly do a whole lot better.

A (soon-to-be-built) George Brown College fog, that is.

Yawn!

Seriously, Chris? The RBC Dexia building?

Okay, I admit that at first it was kinda neat to see those irregular angles but, Wellington Street still feels pretty much like a back road (hint: all the other buildings are still facing the same way). And if asymmetry is what yanks your crank then I’m sure we could find nicer examples. Basically, if this is your top pick then I need to severely start doubting my ability to predict the five worst. Or five whatever, for that matter.

Ugh … Humie’s kinda right about this one, his fifth pick for Toronto’s Worst Buildings: the Four Seasons Centre for the Performing Arts. The fairly new structure (built in 2006),  is an unsightly grey box sitting across the street from the relatively ornate and welcoming Osgoode Hall; even the documentary about the building of the Four Seasons Centre (Raising Valhalla, 2007), has more appeal than the structure itself.

While I haven’t actually been inside the thing — I’m told that it’s a bit of an engineering / acoustic marvel with the performance hall being isolated from the outer shell with giant damper supports; a building on stilts within a building — the spectacle inside doesn’t nearly match the drab outside. One day soon I’m planning to take advantage of the $12 standing-room-only admission, but I can assure you it won’t be because I’m drawn in by the architecture.

Did I mention “ugh” already?

I’m pretty surprised at how much I agree with The Star’s Chris Hume in his evaluation of Toronto architecture. With yesterday’s exception, of course. Perhaps it’s because we both see modernity as forward-looking rather than the total destruction of all we hold near and dear. Maybe we’re both able to see change as a progression rather than a personal attack.

I still reserve the right to be a crotchety old fart when I arrive at the appropriately ripe age, but for now I gotta give Chris his props for his number two “Best Buildings of Toronto” pick, Maple Leaf Square. I love the giant screen looming over the Air Canada Centre’s western entrances, and I like it even more when the square is filled with gawking event attendees — the thought of all those suburbanites surrounded by mighty, erect Toronto towers and majestic, sexy architecture gives me a special feeling.

Actually, dark horses could drag me away. The $3.30 little French press pots at the Dark Horse on Spadina make you feel all sophisticated but, ultimately, the drink works out to be the size of a large coffee. A good coffee, yes, but a caffeinated thoroughbred? I get the feeling that what you’re actually paying for here is the ambiance, and the communal tables kinda ruin that for me. Feels a bit like a stable. At the end of the day, if someone asks me if I prefer Dark Horse over Second Cup, I’ll have to respectfully reply with a neigh.

The Toronto Star’s Cristopher Hume continues his assault on modern sensibilities with his number three pick from his Toronto’s best/worst architecture list, the Michael Lee-Chin Crystal building that juts out from the northern end of the Royal Ontario Museum.

Chris took it upon himself to preempt our collective vitriol and disgust for this building by reassuring us that he’s well aware of just how much we hate it. He picked it nonetheless, pointing to its 21-century styling as the determining factor for his choice. Far be it for me to question his assertions about how all Canadians feel, but personally, I kinda dig this building. It’s an incredibly stark yet beautiful (especially in the right light), extension of the stalwartly historic ROM building, and I’ve yet to read about anyone taking an eye out on the thing, so I guess I’m the one lone Canadian that disagrees.

The prep for the 2015 Pan Am Games continues at Queen’s Quay and Jarvis, with promises of extra camera-fodder to come later this summer (at least from what I can see from my 4th storey perch):

(these are big so give ’em a moment to load)

A.K.A. The George Brown College Chef School, this is Hume’s second pick for his best buildings of Toronto list. I would’ve thought that, maybe, it had something to do with its association with Susur Lee, or maybe some kinda proud culinary tradition or some such junk, but instead Hume likes the building mostly because aspiring chefs can have their kitchen failures ogled by random pedestrians passing by outside — the front is all glass.

Personally, I think Chris is out to lunch with this pick. Maybe he’s simply bit off more than he can chew. Or, if you want, chalk it up to a difference in tastes.

Enough awful food-oriented punnery? Let’s watch the video:

According to the Toronto Star’s Christopher Hume, everybody’s always asking him what the best and worst buildings in the city are. Plus, everybody loves a list. Who am I to argue with such hyperbole-free reasoning? Besides, I have my own faves, and although Chris’ picks would probably make my own Top-20 list, I’m not convinced everybody, everywhere, throughout all known time and dimensions, would agree with either of us. Still, Chris’ picks are a good place to start.

Here’s his #5 pick, the Pure Spirit building that marks the north-west corner of the Distillery District and which, as Mr. Hume so aptly points out, brought order and reason to an area of town that barely obeyed the laws of physics.